Some young people struggle to make friends. Some even say that they are complete failure at friendship. But what are real friends? And how can we make them?

Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend is loving at all times and becomes a brother in times of trouble.” You must know that there is more to friendship than having a shoulder to cry on. A real friend, if they see you going the wrong way, he or she will try to warn you before it’s too late – even if they know you may not like what they say.

Pro. 27:6 says: “There is more trust to be put in bruises from one who loves them in effusive kisses from one who hates.” A real friend is someone who thinks straight and talks straight, that is the kind of friend you should be.

Finding Real Friends?

Where can you find friends who love God? Within the church of course! Look out for youth who do not only profess their faith but also have good works to back up their faith and devotion. (Jam. 2:26).

How, then, can you get friendship started?

1. Show an active interest in others.

Having genuine interest in others is the first step towards making friends. Get to know their name. Others are thrilled that you cared enough to remember their name. This act alone can make them want to share some experience or problem with you and the friendship starts to build.

You do not necessarily have to be an extrovert. It is sincere interest in others that attracts them. Often the simplest things, such as sharing a meal together or assisting someone with a task, can serve to deepen a friendship.

2. Be a good listener

In Luke 8:18, Jesus says “Pay attention to how you listen.” Being a good listener is vital in building a friendship. When you are genuinely interested in what others are saying, they will be usually drawn to you.

3. Be loyal

Another great quality of a friend is his loyalty. A real friend will really stick with you when times get tough. Real friends will stand in for you when facing challenges. Jesus as our perfect example, stuck with his friends. He “loved them to the end” (John. 13:1).

4. Share your feelings

Revealing your feelings to others is also a nature of a true friend. This does not mean that you then pour out your emotions to everyone that you meet. But you can be honest with everyone. And as you get to know and trust someone, you can gradually reveal more of your deepest feelings.

5. Do not expect perfection

Even when a friendship is off to a good start, don’t expect perfection. “We all make mistakes in all kinds of ways, but the man who can claim that he never says the wrong thing can consider himself perfect (Jam. 3:2,).

 Written by E Samuel [Ghana]